Hippy Dippy

23Sep18

Meditation

I don’t get yoga, more to the point, I don’t get people who “go to yoga”.

Hey, I like meditation, it’s better than sitting around and doing nothing. – That’s an old joke and I love the truth in it. One of the BEST things about meditation is that it IS sitting around doing nothing. It’s the main reason I like it and why I’m really good at it.

I also like meditation because I don’t need to buy any special equipment, dress a certain way, interact with anyone, show up at a specific place at a specific time, be told what to do by anyone and best of all, I don’t have to do anything physical.

It’s for these reasons that I am repulsed by yoga. Yoga has taken my favourite thing and turned it into everything I hate. To practice yoga you have to buy a special mat, wear ridiculous clothes, join a group, interact with people, bend, stretch and hurt yourself.

On top of that, they even call it a “class”. That brings back traumatic memories of an experience I had in my childhood, SCHOOL!

I don’t want some oddball who regards themselves as superior to me telling me I’m not doing something properly that I already know how to do. Yoga teachers actually tell you how to breath! And when it comes to meditation, which we’ve already established is, doing nothing, my ability in that area is unsurpassed. If doing nothing was a sport, I’d be the world champion.

It’s for these reasons that you will never find me learning how to improve my downward dog, while being told to breath into my right toe by a ponytailed, lentil-eating basket weaver.

Craic on!

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