Crystal Balls



It’s that time of year again when people in the media make predictions. The only problem is, no one can predict the future. The proof is that nobody predicted what a mess 2016 would turn out to be. This hasn’t stopped “experts” in the media telling us what will happen in 2017.

The masters of inaccurate predictions are the fortune tellers who pretend to be scientists and work at the Met Office. Every long term weather forecast for 2016 was wrong. They predicted snow and ice for what turned out to be one of the warmest Aprils on record  and we got a wet Christmas instead of the white one they promised us.

Not far behind the Met office are the tech gurus. For the last ten years they’ve been predicting that the next must-have gizmos will be, “wearable tech”. So far, every attempt at getting us to wear our gadgets has failed. Google Glass was an optical head-mounted display designed in the shape of a pair of eyeglasses that was going to replace smartphones. Google Glass went on sale to the public on May 15th 2014, how many people do you know that bought this device? Did you EVER even see ANYONE wearing this doohickey? Google finally pulled the plug on Google Glass in January 2015 due to lack of interest.

The prediction that “wearable tech” is the future was wrong and continues to be wrong. If you want some quiet time to yourself in a busy Apple Store, go and stand at the Apple Watch table. No one will bother you there because nobody wants an extension to their iPhone with a tiny screen that straps to your wrist two inches away from where the actual iPhone is when you’re holding it.

My favourite tech prediction that will never come true is the one about internet shopping being delivered by drones. The media love this one and ignore basic truths about drones, including the fact that they can only stay in the air a maximum 25 minutes. Their range is limited even more because they can’t be controlled further away that 6 miles from their base. They don’t even like flying in the rain, never mind snow or hail!

Like a lot of people, I live in a block of flats. How will a drone be able to push the keypad with my number on it, talk to me, wait till I push the button at my end and say, “Come on up”? And then what, will it do? Fly up the stairs or manage to hover in the lobby after pushing the button for the lift? When it gets to my floor, how will it negotiate two fire doors and find my front door? That’s really going to eat into that 25 minute maximum flying time. And what if I’m not home? Is the drone going to leave my stuff with a neighbour?

The only drone that we’ll have in the future is the constant drone of people in the media telling us about a future that won’t happen.

Craic on!

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If you enjoyed this Craic, please click “like” and tweet a link. If you’d like to talk to me about it, call me on +44 1438 422106 between 6am and 9am (UK time) this week on BOB fm.

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