Archive for January, 2014

I don’t understand people who are scared of the dentist. I went for a check-up yesterday and it was no big deal at all. I lay back, he prodded around, said some numbers out loud to the nurse and cleaned my teeth with a water pick. OK, it wasn’t the most pleasurable experience but it wasn’t […]

I’ve found myself in some bizarre situations thanks to radio. Once it happened indirectly but I still blame radio. My first paying job was at 2PK in Parkes in the Central West of New South Wales. They hired me to do the breakfast show but after I made a mess of one of the funeral […]

Pants on Fire


You can tell there’s a general election next year. Politicians on all sides have been trying to win us over by talking about taxation, immigration and protecting the NHS. They’ve also been making promises they can’t keep like free childcare, an extra £20 a week for you if you lose a long term job and […]

I was trapped inside the radio station with the lights out, pretending I wasn’t there. That was the bizarre situation I found myself in one night at my first radio job in 1993. Although I was hired to do the breakfast show at 2PK in Parkes in the Central West of New South Wales, I […]

Justin Case


Last year I got a lot of flack because I wrote a blog about yellow cars. Why would you go for a yellow one when they’re the same price as a silver, black or red one? As usual I’ve been proved right, only idiots drive yellow cars. Justin Bieber has been charged with driving under the influence […]

In 1993, one of the strangest things I discovered while working on the air at 2PK in Parkes in the Central West of New South Wales was the Pinnacle-Grenfell Guinea Pig Races. It’s hard to explain exactly what goes on there so I was delighted to find this YouTube video from a few years ago which […]

Bar Service


England’s first pub at a motorway service station opened today on the M40 in Buckinghamshire. The RAC aren’t happy about it. Professor Stephen Glaister, director of the RAC Foundation, said: ”Does opening a pub at a motorway service station send the right message?” I don’t want a pub on the motorway either but I don’t think it should […]

I’m so glad that my first professional job in commercial radio was at a regional station in Australia. My time at 2PK in the Central West of New South Wales gave me a great grounding in so many different things. When you work at those small stations, you have to be able to do everything. […]

Smoke Screen


Modern smokers are such amateurs. Years ago people who smoked looked like they knew what they were doing. The cigarette and the smoke became a part of who they were. They held it confidently like it wasn’t actually on fire, never consciously thinking about it or looking at it. They could hold a conversation and […]

Police in regional Australia are very different to Sydney cops. They take a more practical approach to problem solving. We found this out when Julie and I lived in Parkes in the Central West of New South Wales. We’d moved there in 1993 because I’d got a job on the air at the local radio […]

What have Howard Stern, Jerry Seinfeld and Russell Brand got in common? OK they’re all successful entertainers, they also meditate. The more I looked into it, the list of celebrities and super-successful people who say meditation has helped them in their personal and professional lives is so long that it might be easier to list: “Successful […]

Being on the radio every day is the coolest job in the world. So many people want to do it but don’t know how to get started so they do odd things to get noticed. My first on-air job was at 2PK in New South Wales, Australia. The radio station was in Parkes. In 1993, […]

Dirty Windows


I’ve had enough of Windows computers. Every time I buy a new one, it comes with a different operating system that doesn’t work properly with the programs I ran on the computer it replaced. There’s a constant threat of viruses, spyware & malware. The terror of being wiped out by a virus is used to make […]

What do you do when you come face to face with deadly spiders? My first paid job in commercial radio was at 2PK, in Parkes which is in the Central West of New South Wales. Julie and I moved there from Sydney so I could present the afternoon show. We soon discovered that we shared […]

Word Up


The words “homophobia” and “homophobic” really bother me because they’re inaccurate. The Oxford English Dictionary defines a ‘phobia’ as “an extreme or irrational fear of or aversion to something”. People who are homophobic aren’t scared or averse to homosexuals, they just hate them. People are said to suffer from a phobia. Are homophobic people suffering? […]

When I finally got my first professional broadcasting job, things started out OK but by my third week on the air, I was convinced that I was going to get fired every single day I worked there. In August 1993, “Hits and Memories 2PK” in Parkes New South Wales were looking for a new Breakfast […]

A rooster frightened the life out of me this morning. It was 5am and I was bent over in the dark opening the padlock to the gate that leads from the isolated country lane in the grounds of Knebworth House in Hertfordshire to the JACK fm building. As far as locations go, it’s the most […]

If it wasn’t for an imaginary cat food and a re-cycled nursery rhyme I might never have got my first break in radio. In 1993 I knew I didn’t stand a chance of getting a full-time job on the air in Australia unless I did really well at The Australian Film Television and Radio School. […]

Fat Chance


“Does this (garment) make me look fat?” It’s a question women usually ask their other half and there is no correct answer. Honesty is never the best policy but if you lie and she later decides that you’re wrong, you’ll be in just as much trouble. Well It turns out that women also ask each […]

Where does inspiration come from? I know for me, it’s the things that are going on around me that find their way on to the radio. It’s always been that way. When I was studying at The Australian Film Television and Radio School, we had a comedy writing assignment. I had to write a pilot […]