Mack’s Craic

24Jul11

Good evening Mr Bond.

Rupert Murdoch has left the country on his private jet. A sexy blonde pilot in a low cut uniform flew him all the way to his private airport on a tropical island. A Chinese chauffeur in a black suit and bowler hat, met them and loaded his luggage into the boot of a large convertible. Rupert got in the back. They drove off towards Murdoch’s secret lair which is hidden inside a volcano. When it started to rain, Rupert pushed a button on the arm rest. And it stopped raining.

The Mackmobile is still silent. The radio lost its code after a flat battery and without an enigma machine I’ve got to buy a new one. I’ve ordered a DAB radio. That’s already caused problems because it needs a new aerial as well. I’m not convinced DAB is the future of radio. There aren’t that many extra stations on it compared to internet radio and it doesn’t even work that well. Maybe it’s no coincidence that DAB backwards spells BAD. I’ll let you know how I get on anyway.

I’m fed up of hearing that people have worked “tirelessly”. I don’t believe these people worked without getting tired.

I really miss Borders the book shop. Who’d have thought a shop where you can sit and read books without buying them would fail?

Thanks for all of the Mack’s Facts you’ve been calling into the radio show. Here’s this week’s Top Ten:

  1. Never take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
  2. Concrete will not set until a cat has walked through it.
  3. There is a gland in your belly button that secretes blue fluff.
  4. Time wounds all heals.
  5. Cuckoos do not build their own nests. This is because they live in a clock.
  6. Don’t use time to save money. Spend money to save time.
  7. Politicians are like nappies, they should be changed regularly. For the same reason.
  8. In a fast food restaurant if they say “Sorry about the weight”, take the hint!
  9. Don’t change the password on your computer at work on the Friday before a long weekend.
  10. It’s not what happens to you that matters, it’s how you deal with it that counts.

Look through another Craic next week! 

Check out the Mack Nuggets at www.mackmedia.co.uk .

Listen to the Graham Mack Breakfast Show Podcast on iTunes.


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